I was reading a book on taming temper tantrums (in toddlers, not adults!) and came across a sentence that stopped me in my tracks: It takes five words of praise to cancel one single word of criticism.
It got me to thinking just how true that statement is. I know in my lifetime, the things that I remember most that people have said to me have not been the kind words, but the unkind ones. I have found that to be especially true in my marriage. I find myself holding past comments from Isaak against him sometimes months or years after he has said them. I think that is true for most people. It's a lot easier to believe something bad about yourself than something good. That's just human nature. And while we may forgive that person for saying it, we have a harder time forgetting it. It's also a lot easier to say something bad than it is to say something nice to someone. And for me, once that bad thing is said, I have a hard time forgetting it, no matter how many words of praise may follow. It's just one more reminder that we should all think before we speak, and ask ourselves if we really want to say something negative. No matter what that sentence above says, sometimes five words or praise are not enough to cancel out one critical statement.
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