I've forgotten how to be me.....

I'm having another one of those times when Connor is with my mom. He's been at her house since Monday afternoon.
You'd think I'd be doing cartwheels, but I'm not. Of course I miss the little guy, but that's not what my lack of enthusiasm is about. It's because I've forgotten how to be me.

Now what in the world does that mean, you're wondering. Well, let me explain.

For the last 3 years of my life, I have pretty much given up everything outside of the home to take care of my son. Even before I knew he had autism, I had made the decision to quit my full-time reporting job to stay home with him. I lost the freedom to do much of anything else, as well. That's just the nature of being a parent. When you're responsible for another little person, your needs have to fall by the wayside. So I stopped writing, I stopped going to the gym and I stopped worrying about whether I had "me" time.

Now that my son is older, I've been freelance writing more, and have had some newfound time out to myself. But when that happens, I have become dumbfounded as to what to do with myself. It's been so long since I really had no one to answer to but myself that I have forgotten what it is I used to do! As a result, I usually end up using my "free" time to do work, which isn't a great idea, because then I don't feel refreshed at all when my son returns home. It's a vicious cycle, because I just have no idea what to do to entertain myself. Anyone have any ideas? I'm open to suggestions at this point. :)

Radio talkshow host calls autism a fraud and hoax

See this smiling man in the photo? He is an idiot. I know that is not a very Christian thing to say about someone, but after reading what this man said about autism today, I think if I saw him on the street right now, I might have to throttle him.

Here is a link to his lovely comments about autism: http://mediamatters.org/items/200807170005
In a nutshell, he said autism isn't real, that kids who are diagnosed with it are just plain brats and need proper discipline. As the parent of a child with autism, I am extremely offended by his comments. I have joined with other parents of children with autism to campaign for this man's firing. I also think he needs to publicly apologize for his comments on air.

I have encountered so much misinformation about autism out there that it is sad. And comments like the ones Mr. Savage made do not help matters. Autistic children and their parents have enough to deal with in their daily lives without having someone tell them their diagnosis isn't real. I hope Mr. Savage never knows the pain of having a loved one with this diagnosis.

If you would like to voice your complaint over this

To lodge a complaint against Mike Savage, call Talk Radio Network at 541-664-8827.

Contacts:

Wendy Fournier (Portsmouth, RI) 401-835-5828

Rita Shreffler (Nixa, MO) 401-632-6452

SOURCE National Autism Association

Good fences make good neighbors

I think we've probably all heard that analogy before. And sometimes (like in the case of the people who live right next to us), good fences do make good neighbors.

But today, I found out what else makes good neighbors. And that's a loving, caring attitude.

A nice family who lives a few houses down dropped off a basket filled to the rim with food for us today. They had prepared a meal, then finished it off with pantry items we might need. It included a note saying they were thinking of us and that because we had been good neighbors to them, they wanted to be good neighbors to us in our time of need. The note said they planned to bring us a basket like that every week until my husband had a new job. I later found money tucked inside the basket, too. It was just too much.

I was moved to tears by their generosity. So was my husband. And he's not the type to get emotional that easily. But how can you not be emotional about that kind of thoughtfulness?

Yes, we've been good neighbors to them. I've babysat their cat on more than one occasion while they were away, but anyone who knows me knows I love animals, so that was no chore at all. I remember greeting them on the day they moved to the neighborhood, and baked them a cake. None of these things are stuff I expected gratitude for. Again, that's just who I am. But they have remembered each instance, and recounted it in their letter. It was so nice to know that someone cares enough about us to do this. We only hope that we can continue to be good neighbors to them, no fences required. :)

A perfect example of selflessness.....

" Lord, help me to remember that nothing is going to happen

to me today, that you and I together can't handle."

That was the verse that was printed and laminated for me, and handed to me today at church. The gentleman who went to the trouble is Bob Keener. Bob is a great guy. He's the type of person I strive to be....always positive, upbeat and trusting in God to lead him where he's meant to be, even if it's not where he really wants to go.
Bob knows we're having it tough right now. With all the stuff that's happening with my dad, plus the events of last week, he's been a rock for me. He's let me know how much he cares and that he's praying for me, and that makes all the difference in the world. He and his wife, Sally, truly are great people. What's even more amazing is that Bob is even able to focus on anything or anyone else right now.
Bob currently is halfway through a 42 week radiation treatment for prostate cancer. Every day, he goes for his treatments, which have to be hard on him. But he's always asking about others, caring about others and worrying about others before himself. He truly is a good example of a Christ-like person. If I were going through what he's going through right now, I'm not so sure I could remain as upbeat. And I'm pretty sure I'd be busy wallowing in my own troubles to ask others how they are doing. But not Bob. He is a perfect example of what selflessness truly is.
I'm now carrying that laminated verse around with me everywhere I go. When I start to feel a little down, I'm going to look at it, say it out loud, and thank God for people like Bob Keener.

Out of the mouths of babes.....

Kids Answer Questions About Life and Love

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like
sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep
the chips and dip coming. -- Alan, age 10

No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to
marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later
who you're stuck with. -- Kristen, age 10

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

Twenty-three is the best age Because you know the person FOREVER by then. -- Camille, age 10
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at
the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

Both don't want any more kids. -- Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know
each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long
enough. -- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually
gets them interested enough to go for a second date. -- Martin, age
10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the
newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns. -- Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

When they're rich. -- Pam, age 7

The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with
that. -- Curt, age 7

The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry
them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. -- Howard,
age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to
clean up after them. -- Anita, age 9 (bless you child )
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? --
Kelvin, age 8
And the #1 Favorite is........

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump
truck. -- Ricky, age10 (a future marriage-counselor) .

Bad luck comes in threes.....

If you had asked me just a few hours ago what kind of week I've been having, I probably would have run screaming from the room.

On Tuesday, my son was diagnosed with PDD-NOS, which is a mild form of autism. While I expected the diagnosis, it still wasn't easy to hear. Of all the autism diagnoses to receive, this is the best, because it can be removed once the child has received proper therapy and overcomes their problems. For my son, his issues are so subtle that most people don't even notice. So I was thankful, because it could have been worse. While we were at the center where he was diagnosed, I saw what a worst-case autism diagnosis looked like, and it nearly broke my heart. It made me glad my son was not in that category.

On Tuesday night, my husband arrived home from work over an hour late. Turns out he was in a car accident. The kid behind him decided to pass him on the right while he was stopped at a stop sign. Now mind you, this was on a back, rural road, not I-79. The kid did some minor scraping damage, plus tore off the passenger side mirror, of my husband's car. But the fun part is this kid's dad, who owns a body shop, tried to bully us into letting him fix it and not report it to the insurance. We had the bad feeling this wasn't the first time this kid's dad had cleaned up his bad driving mess, so we said no. The guy is being difficult. He's called us several times, driven past our house and is engaging in behavior that can only be described as harassing. We're going to have to pay our insurance deductible, then file a claim and hope this kid's insurance agency reimburses us. If not, we're on the short end of the stick.

Just when I didn't think it could get any worse, my husband came home yesterday and informed me his contract had been terminated at work. He's been a "contract" employee for 17 months. We knew they could end it at any time, but we really had no warning it was going to happen.

Three whammies in one week is enough to make anyone feel a little unhappy.

But this afternoon, there was a ray of light. A guy who owns his own company had inquired about my husband's resume earlier this week. My husband sent him one this morning, because now that he's unemployed, he had time to do it. By this afternoon, he had a job interview. It sounds like the guy might make him an offer, too, which would be nice. It would be another contract position, but it sounds promising. I guess it's true that when one door closes, another opens.

So if you had asked me just 8 hours ago what kind of day I was having, I'd have had to say it was a 10 on the stink-o-meter. But now, it's definitely looking up.

Swingin'

HE DID IT! CONNOR SWUNG ON THE BIG KID SWING ALL BY HIMSELF!

We've been working on this for quite awhile, but he had this issue with remembering to hold on. For two years, he's been in an infant/toddler swing, and with the way it's designed, he hasn't had to hold on. I was starting to think he'd never catch on. But last night, we were at the neighbor's house playing, and he plopped himself right down on a big kid swing and went to town! I almost cried I was so excited.

WAY TO GO CONNOR!

Next achievement.....riding the scary roller coaster at Kennywood. Just kidding. Just kidding. I don't even like to do that. :)